IT’S TIME FOR KIRITO-KUN.
Sword Art Online II Episode 21 Review
Sword Art Online Season 2 Episode 21 Review
Alright, you motherfuckers. I know I haven’t been posting much, but exams, and HxH review, and shit, okay? SO TODAY WE’RE JUST GOING TO JUST HAVE SOME FUN AND WITNESS THE GLORY OF THE KIRITO-KUN BLESSED BY THE ONE TRUE GOD TATSUYA STU‘S STU. MOVE ASIDE FOR THE APOSTLE OF THE STU. IT’S TIME FOR SOME KIRITO-KUN.
WARNING: RANDOM BULLSHIT AHEAD REGARDLESS OF WHETHER YOU SKIP TO THE “REVIEW” SECTION OR NOT.
Sword Art Online II Episode 21 Impressions
See guys, this is what SAO should stick to. It should stick to showing Kirito-kun being fucking sugoi instead of all that dramatic bullshit with Sinon’s ass cheeks. I¬†mean, just look at Kirito-kun’s condescending smile while preparing to chop all the mages’ ballsacks into pieces. Even Asuna’s party couldn’t hold onto their pants as the glasses dude expands his small eyes more than he ever has to take in as much of Kirito-kun’s sugoiness as possible. I MEAN SHIT, EVEN THE GUY WHO HAS HIS EYES CLOSED THE WHOLE FUCKING TIME OPENS HIS EYES AT THE GLORY OF KIRITO-KUN. Anyways, since in anime format it’s difficult to show exactly what’s going through the heads of the 30+ people, let us dig deeper into the psyche of these pitiful plebians¬†as¬†they face one of the strongest apostles of the Stu. By the end, you shall see for yourself what happens to those who stand against Him.
THE TALE OF THE ONES WHO WENT AGAINST KIRITO-KUN
The leader of the raid party rushes forward¬†with his group of 30+ members.¬†He confidently smiled at the thought of finally being able to take a boss down while disposing of some unwanted noobies¬†along the way. However, his smile only lasted a short time.¬†With startling speed, a person in black clothing runs on the curvature of the walls surpassing the whole group. He then jumps off the wall to put himself between the reinforcements and Asuna’s group while sliding in the coolest fucking way possible. “Fuck,” the leader¬†lamented. “Not this guy again. He already cleared all those floors before, and now he’s getting in our¬†way even though he came along with us? This fucking asshole, I swear to god¬†we’re going to put him and that shit-eating grin fairy in their place toni-”
“Sorry,” The Black Swordsman says cutting off the leader’s thoughts. He stabs the ground as if to claim that they won’t go beyond that point. “This place…” he says with Yui and her LET’S-FUCKING-GET-IT-ON-PLEBS face on his shoulders. “Is off-limits.”
Even with his superior numbers, the leader could not help but feel anxious. It was
Kirito-kun Blacky-sensei after all. Still, to maintain his dignity, he boldly¬†declares, “Hey, Blacky-sensei… Even you can’t possibly fight this many people at once, can you?” Thankfully, the distance put between them allowed him to hide the beads of sweat rolling down his face.
“I’m not so sure about that,” Kirito-kun says knowing full well that these plebians stood absolutely no chance against the power that The One True God Tatsuya Stu bestowed upon him. “I’ve never tried.” Indeed, ever since the time in SAO when he endured countless strikes while standing still noticing that his HP regeneration overpowered their DPS he’s never felt the inclination to even try against these commoners.
Trying to be cool when he’s clearly going¬†to suffer erectile dysfunction by the time this is all over due to the manly sight of Kirito-kun and how he pales in comparison, the leader orders the mages to use magic against Kirito-kun.¬†In actuality, he thought to himself, “L-Let’s just hope we won’t get wiped.”
Asuna looks toward Kirito-kun and vainly calls his name and then looks back to her party not knowing what to do.¬†At this point, the collective audience watching this anime is probably facepalming at her lack of decision-making skills. Let’s be fucking honest. Should she help the grinning motherfucker Kirito-kun who she already saw in GGO was capable of cutting bullets going at Mach 10, or should she help her party? No fucking shit, Asuna-chan.
Then we cut to the opening with explosions cock teasing us making us think that he actually got hit when in fact he didn’t.¬†The animators need to repent for their sin of ever thinking that Kirito-kun should endure an explosion from plebians of this caliber.
Whatever the case, Kirito-kun swings his sword around showing off how cool he is, but Yui’s body couldn’t handle it anymore and swiftly flew away from Kirito-kun. The amount of manly Stuness was simply too much even for the tiny daughteru to handleru.¬†So much for her papa love. I suppose it’s no surprise that the Stu overpowers even that.
Once again, Kirito-kun grins cockily as if he were just fooling around with all of them.¬†By now,¬†the leader and the rest of the party knew just how fucked they were. One by one, the magic flying towards him was cut down with incredible Stuness. Kirito-kun added in a few flips in here and there that he learned from The One True God Himself because why the fuck not? By the end, you fucking guessed it, the guy was grinning yet again.
The tank dude for Asuna’s party opened his eyes for the very first time after witnessing the power of the Stu while moronically¬†saying, “It wasn’t chance?” You have to wonder if seeing the Stu was so overwhelming for him that he became retarded because the level of stupidity in that¬†question is even greater¬†than the fatness of Sinon’s fat ass cheeks.
“Even the fastest magic is slower than an anti-materiel rifle’s bullet,” Kirito-kun says with hardly any shits given. It was literally the first time anyone has ever uttered such a sentence because of how ridiculous it is. Yui’s panties are now so tied up because of all of this that she has to sit down on her papa’s shoulders. Being a fucking tiny fairy is rough, man. You gotta endure Kirito-kun’s sugoi shit all the fucking time wondering if your existence is a joke in comparison to his. Pointy ears, Sinon’s ass, Asuna’s… uhh… boobies, Sugu’s mammaries, other loli shit that I forgot the name of, excalibur, naturally cocky grinning handsome face, and the list of positives for Kirito-kun never stops.
Not understanding what the fuck Kirito-kun is talking about due to the disparity in intelligence, the leader of the raid is left stunned. “Anti-materiel rifles? Just what the fuck is he talking about?” he thought. “I am playing Alfheim Online, right?”
Little does he know, he’s not playing Alfheim Online. He’s playing Kirito-kun’s playhouse and he’s the toy that’s going to get broken today.
After shitting his pants repeatedly for the past few minutes, he’s now accumulated enough shit that he’s ready to take Kirito-kun on without shitting out more shit. But he suddenly realized that he wasn’t wearing diapers today. “Well, shit,” he thought.
“Well, shit” indeed. He was going to get taken out with shit in his pants and he’s going to like it. After realizing this, he quickly stutters, “G-Get into formation!” as if any of that actually mattered.
By now, the accumulated shit in the raid party¬†was so immense that even Asuna’s party could smell it. Kirito-kun, with all his Stuness, was of course invulnerable to such plebian status effects.
With all the people with shit in their pants in a defensive shit position in front of him, Kirito-kun says dramatically, “I’ll buy you three minutes!” Well, it was certainly going to smell pretty bad for the next three minutes.
After destroying the plebians blocking her way with supersonic speed, Asuna glances back with the doors closing slowly at the atrocity¬†left in the wake of Kirito-kun taking care of all the shit. It was a fiery hell in front of Kirito-kun.¬†That’s right. As expected of Kirito-kun, he set fire to all the shit in those people’s pants. With a peace sign, he signaled how he’s taken care of all the shit and was dramatically consumed by the flames of shit.
After realizing that the air was not going to get any less shitty any time soon, Asuna feels some relief that the doors were closing. “Yeah, I’m off to go win,” Asuna says, bidding farewell to the smell of shit. The doors closed tightly,¬†but beyond it the flames of shit continued to burn.
And that is why, ladies and gentlemen, you never mess with the Stu. You’ll end up in a lot of shit.