Sword Art Online II Episode 3 Review
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“Memories of Blood”
“Senketsu no Kioku”
Alright, I was going to wait until
Kirito-kun Kirito-chan actually got into the game, but I can’t wait any longer. It’s time for some SAO HEADSHOT REKTNOOBGGPLSGTFOMLGNOSCOPE2520BACKFLIP GOODNESS.
Sword Art Online II Episode 3 Impressions
Alright all you motherfuckers. Are you looking at your screen right now? You bet your ass you’re looking at your screen. Did you see that 2520Â flip headshot rektownage by Sinon last episode? You better have because you’ll never be as good as Sinon Sue. And you know what? While you were sitting on your ass when you were five years old sitting on your ass playing with Lego (nothing against Lego because it’s fucking awesome), Sinon was already MLGing it up and shooting crazy bitches in the head ONE TWO FUCKING THREE RIGHT IN THE CENTER OF THE FOREHEAD. Even Kirito-kun isn’t so sugoi that he’s able to pull that shit off. But then again, for all we know, he was probably programmingÂ a new magical method of flight- Oh shit wrong animu. Uhh… Anyways, some bitches are messing with Sinon because they’re just jealous that they can’t shoot some stealin’ niggaz as smoothly as she can. They’re exploiting her PTSD from being too awesome at the age of five. Even her mom couldn’t handle how she handled that pistol. Hell, if she were my daughter I’d be like, “HOLY SHIT SINON MY NIGGA THAT’S SOME SKILL THERE,” and train her to be the best MLG player or train her to be a professional assassin or something like that. Maybe if her mother did something like that instead of gawking at her like she’s some no-name noob looking at some 720noscope action, Sinon would have taken her pro skills better. You know what they say, with great skillz comes great jealousy. Tatsuya Stu is another example as all the girls swarm to him while all those disgraceful blooms’ jimmies are so rustled they end up being knocked out so Tatsuya Stu can shine again. What a joke.
You know what’s the problem though? We’re three episodes in, and we haven’t seen any Kirito-chan action yet. I mean, shit. I have all my “KIRITO-CHAN SO SUGOI” all piled up and ready to go, but Asuna with her shitty questions about the difference between real life and the virtual world keeps cockblocking my shit. Like, fuck. Can you believe that question? I bet if you ask a eight-year-old kid they’ll know what’s up. Even Kirito-kun is getting tired of her shit. While she’s grasping and hugging and whatever other crap she’s doin, Kirito-kun seems like he gives no fucks. I wonder if the writer is just trying to make Asuna as retarded as possible so Kirito-kun can go out and find more Mary Sues. Seriously, does Kirito-kun even care about Asuna anymore? He’s so apathetic about his relationship with her that Asuna should be picking up dem signals that he may be spanking some other booties in his spare time.Â Then again, his booty is the one being spanked already by that hot nurse. Looks like Kirito-kun is into that and Asuna needs to step it up a notch if she wants to stand a chance. I can imagine it now. The Adventures of Kirito’s butt and Sinon’s ass. Hell, I’d spank them both… Okay, maybe just Sinon’s.
Sword Art Online II Episode 3 Review
I’m going to give it to all of you straight. Most of the time, I’m not going to be critically reviewing Sword Art Online or analyzing it seriously for a few reasons. Firstly, I view this entire seriesÂ to be quite similar to Mahouka in the sense that it’s best to not take it too seriously for the most partÂ because of theÂ Gary Stu and Mary Sue elements with other absurdities. Secondly, many other reviewers have already discussed the various faults of Sword Art Online as a whole, so retreading that ground is quite useless. Thirdly, it’s a lot more fun to do things this way than to talk as I usually do about the various things that the show does well and doesn’t do well. There simply aren’t many shows where I can sit back, relax, laugh my ass off at how Kirito-chan is going to cut bullets, and other fun absurdities like that. It’s pretty rare that you’d get a season where there are two shows that are like this airing on the same day. Heck, it’s not often that you even get to see Gary Stus as Stu as this in the first place. I actually think I’d be doing a disservice if I were toÂ review it seriously most of the time because it feels like a lot of potentially fun moments are discarded for the sake of doing so which really isn’t the approach I think we should be taking with shows like this.Â What I will say seriously this time is that Sinon’s backstory is definitely an interesting one that makes me feel more invested in her as a character. Building up her character like this so early on is great because it allows viewers to care more right from the beginning so that the development that occursÂ throughout the season will be more meaningful to the audience. I just can’t wait for Sinon and Kirito-chan to wipe the smile off that Dekomori Desu-gun ChuuniRen fanboi’s face.Â How twisted do you have to be to name your gunÂ after such a horrible season 2? Divine Kirito-chan lightsaber justice with Sinon’s ass cheeks will straighten things up. Until then, enjoy the SAO KIRITO-CHAN GGO SLICING BULLET SINON BUTT GOODNESS + MAHOUKA NO TATSUYA STU MARY SUE WINCEST SATURDAYS!